Parenting and Neurodiversity
- JM Ryerson
- Oct 9
- 4 min read
I recently sat down with Sara Hartley, a healthcare executive, author, and certified neurodiversity and ADHD coach, to explore how surprising diagnoses, deep intuition, and parental pressure shaped her path into writing a 13-book children’s series and creating a practical toolkit for families.
What follows is a condensed and reader-friendly version of our conversation. It covers her journey with Lyme disease, her insights on neurodiversity, and the strategies she uses to stay present, productive, and resilient.
From Mystery Symptoms to a Life-Changing Diagnosis
For years Sara felt “off.” Strange health issues and low energy set her apart from others. The turning point came in 2021 when a close friend’s Lyme diagnosis and an article that mentioned children with Bell’s palsy prompted questions about her own health and her youngest son’s early facial nerve issue. After months of challenging and expensive testing, she finally tested positive for Lyme disease and several co-infections in September 2021.
That diagnosis came at a moment of burnout. Yet it also unlocked a creative surge that became the Purposefully Me children’s series. Learning how to understand her body and how illness impacted her family inspired stories and tools that teach kids and adults how to turn differences into strengths.
Intuition, Empathy, and the Burden of Memory
Sara has always trusted her instincts. She describes a natural empathy and a sharp awareness when meeting people. This intuition is part of how her brain is wired: she senses energy, mirrors emotions, and picks up cues quickly. For many neurodiverse people, this sensitivity can be both empowering and exhausting.
“Many people who are neurodiverse or have ADHD can be deep empaths, to where you feel the weight of the world. It can be a blessing and a curse.”
As a child, Sara had a photographic memory that helped her succeed quietly in school. Over time, Lyme disease and ADHD chipped away at that clarity. Outwardly she appeared in control, while inwardly she wrestled with constant mental noise and decision fatigue.
Why She Wrote Children’s Books
Raising a highly gifted son with ADHD showed Sara how schools often miss the mark in supporting difference. To build his confidence, she started nightly affirmations: “I am kind. I am smart. I am enough.” These affirmations became the foundation for her first book.
The initial story came to her during a shower, and she kept writing as her children’s experiences inspired more topics. Today her 13-book series covers ADHD, autism, anxiety, grief, bullying, Down syndrome, divorce, and more. Each book combines affirmations with practical strategies for children, parents, and teachers.
Hyperfocus: A Strength and a Challenge
ADHD is not just about being unable to focus. For Sara, it means struggling to choose the right focus. Once she locks in, she hyperfocuses, which drives her creativity and productivity but often causes her to forget basic needs like food, water, or family time.
To balance hyperfocus, she relies on routines:
Calendar blocks for deep work and scheduled breaks
Morning movement such as walking or exercise to reset the nervous system
Grounding exercises like the 5-4-3-2-1 method
Walking as a way to shift from rumination into problem-solving
Accountability groups to help sustain progress and avoid burnout
The Nirvana Letter and Symbols of Manifestation
Sara practices a ten-year “Nirvana letter.” In it, she writes as though the next decade has already happened, describing where she is, who she is with, and what she has accomplished. She pairs this with a small personal symbol of manifestation. For her, that symbol is rainbows.
These rituals keep her connected to creative momentum and help her stay aligned with her goals.
“Find that one thing that is a symbol for you.”
The ALIGN Parenting Method
Sara developed a parenting framework she calls ALIGN. It is designed to de-escalate parent-child meltdowns quickly, often in less than a minute.
Awareness: Notice your own state and the environment.
Listen: Hear the child and label their feelings out loud.
Identify: Recognize triggers for both you and your child.
Ground: Use a fast reset such as water, naming colors, or the 5-4-3-2-1 method.
Nurture: Be present, validate, and offer choices.
She shared a moment at a hot, noisy baseball game when her son began to melt down. By naming the triggers, offering water, guiding him through grounding, and giving him a choice, she was able to shift the entire afternoon in under a minute.
What Neurodiversity Really Looks Like
Neurodiversity describes brains wired in different ways, including ADHD, autism, dyslexia, sensory processing differences, and giftedness. Many people experience overlaps.
Common misunderstandings include:
Neurodiversity is a spectrum, not a single label
ADHD presents differently in each person
Sensory struggles are often mistaken for defiance
School systems are not designed for every type of brain
Sara emphasizes that when parents and teachers choose curiosity and compassion, they radically shift a child’s experience.
“It is very difficult to be angry and empathetic at the same time.”
Career, Purpose, and Practical Steps
Sara’s day job is in healthcare marketing and AI-driven growth, where she helps patients find the right doctors and improves the care journey. This complements her coaching and books, both of which focus on making systems and people easier to navigate.
Her advice for parents and adults exploring neurodiversity:
Connect with supportive communities and peer groups
Seek therapists or coaches who understand neurodiversity
Test small routines like movement, grounding breaks, and calendar boundaries
Use frameworks like ALIGN to defuse tension quickly
Write your own Nirvana letter and pick a symbol that inspires you
Turning Challenge Into Purpose
Sara Hartley’s journey from chronic illness and ADHD to writing 13 children’s books demonstrates how difficult experiences can fuel creativity and purpose. Her work shows that whether you are a parent, a teacher, or an individual navigating neurodiversity, the essentials are the same: stay curious, build routines, find community, and use simple strategies to restore calm and connection.
If even one of these ideas helps you, whether it is the ALIGN method, a grounding exercise, or a shift in how you see a child’s behavior, share it forward. We grow by spreading understanding.
Where to Learn More
Watch this full episode of the Let's Go Win podcast on YouTube
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