Lost It All, Thank God!

In this latest episode of the Let's Go Win podcast, I sit down with Josh Kosnick for a powerful conversation about connection and what we lose when screens replace real human interaction.

Some moments hit like a freight train. A job you poured your identity into disappears. A trusted teammate betrays you. Life rearranges itself and, for a while, everything feels shattered. Those seasons are brutal. They are also where the most important work begins: reclaiming who you are, resetting priorities, and learning how to live in Kairos—those rare, powerful pockets of flow where time collapses and purpose feels obvious.

Lead with authenticity so people want to be better

Authentic leadership isn’t a checkbox. It’s a stance. When you show up direct, honest, and human, people don’t shut down—they lean in and try to improve. If that sounds like you want to be blunt for the sake of bluntness, it’s not. The goal is to lead from a place of truth that inspires growth.

One small but powerful lesson: just because you don’t need affirmation doesn’t mean everyone else doesn’t. Recognition matters. High performers often grew up without much praise and feel awkward receiving it, but they can still learn to give it—and should. Leaders who balance authenticity with intentional recognition create teams that thrive.

When identity is tied to a role, loss feels like a death

Losing a leadership role or a business you built can feel indistinguishable from losing yourself. That shock is part practical and part spiritual. Practical because you have obligations; spiritual because so much of your identity was wrapped up in a title, a balance sheet, or a status.

“So much of us place our identity in what we do… my identity was trapped in all the wrong things.”

Walking through that grief looks a lot like grieving a loved one. You hit the five stages and slowly re-emerge. The hidden gift is perspective: when the noise is stripped away, you see what actually matters—faith, family, health, relationships. Those are the foundations that survive any professional collapse.

Forgiveness: not for them, for you

Forgiveness is often misunderstood as condoning the behavior of the person who hurt you. It is not. Forgiveness is a release. It’s the decision to stop carrying poison inside you.

Key point: Forgiveness is primarily for your freedom. You don’t need to confront the person or absolve them publicly. You do need to reclaim your life. That also includes forgiving yourself. Many people find it easier to forgive the other person than to forgive themselves for perceived mistakes. Start there.

How to spot and handle narcissists—hiring and daily interactions

Narcissism often hides behind charisma and high performance. That makes it dangerous in teams and organizations. The antidote is careful behavioral interviewing and disciplined interpersonal boundaries.

Behavioral interview questions to raise red flags

• What was the hardest thing you had to overcome growing up? (Look for introspection and growth.)

• Which single value from your mother do you carry today? Which from your father? (Values that persist are revealing.)

• Tell me about a past conflict with a coworker. How was it resolved? (Watch for acceptance of responsibility.)

• Tell me about a conflict with a superior. What happened and what did you learn? (A true narcissist will never own any fault.)

Look for a willingness to accept even a small percentage of responsibility. If every story ends with “they were the problem,” you’ve probably found an unstable actor.

Deal with narcissists using facts, not feelings

• Keep communication short, factual, and written where possible.

• Never engage on an emotional battlefield they create. They will gaslight and escalate to win the narrative.

• Use the PLAN framework to stay centered: Purpose (stay on purpose), Listen, Ask questions, Next steps. Let the conversation be forward-moving and outcome-driven.

Kairos and Kronos: two ways to live in time

In ancient Greek there are two concepts of time. Kronos is clock time—the minutes, hours, and schedules. Kairos is the qualitative moment when you’re fully present, everything lines up, and time collapses. Athletes call it “in the zone.” Artists call it “in the flow.” Both are real, but Kairos is fleeting.

Only God or fate might fully live in Kairos, but people can catch glimpses of it. The practical question is: how do you catch it more often?

Practical ways to invite Kairos

• Reduce distractions: put your phone away. Notifications are designed to hijack attention.

• Set an intention before every transition. Example: “Be the best hour of this client’s day.” The intention primes your behavior and increases the chance of flow.

• Create space for deep work and presence: short, regular blocks of uninterrupted time beat fragmented attention.

Morning routines, daily rituals, and separation rituals

There is no one-size-fits-all perfect routine. The point of a morning routine is to get your mind ready for battle. Here’s a practical framework you can adapt.

Example routine that builds presence and resilience

1. Move first: a brisk walk, ruck, or light exercise to get the body online.

2. Hydrate and use breathwork: breathing techniques and short, focused prayers or meditations.

3. Read or journal briefly: 1–2 pages of reading or a short reflection to set mindset.

4. Delay the phone: no email, social, or notifications until you’ve completed your routine.

Another useful habit is a midday physical session. Lift heavy or do an intense workout between work and home to create a mental separation. It’s a reset that helps you shift from professional mode to present parent or partner.

The Five Bridges of Kairos: a practical prioritization model

When life collapses it’s easy to realize you were prioritizing the wrong things. The Five Bridges model helps you re-balance priorities so you can live with clarity and intentionality.

1. Spiritual — Whatever your beliefs, a spiritual grounding gives purpose and perspective. When that’s right, other losses feel less crushing.

2. Internal — Mental, emotional, and physical health. You must put your oxygen mask on first.

3. Relationships — Prioritize in this order: spiritual foundation, yourself, spouse, kids, then others. Relationships are the fruit of a life well-lived.

4. Environments — Professional, financial, creative, and joy-filled spaces. These matter, but they should be built on the previous three bridges.

5. Legacy — Legacy is not about deposits or possessions. It is about the imprint you leave on people. You leave legacy every day through your actions, not sometime in the distant future.

Action steps you can apply today

• Pick one priority from the Five Bridges and take one small action today to strengthen it.

• Create a two-minute intention before each meeting: state it silently and let it guide your behavior.

• If you’re hiring, add two behavioral interview questions that require a story, not yes/no answers.

• When interacting with a difficult person, write facts only. Save feelings and narratives for private reflection, not the conversation.

• Practice self-forgiveness: name one thing you’re hard on yourself for and list one way you can make amends or change going forward.

Closing thought

Hard seasons are terrible and they are fertile. They force you to strip away illusions and rebuild what actually matters. The most resilient people don’t avoid pain. They use it as an opportunity to re-center, find their Kairos moments more often, and intentionally leave a legacy in the people they touch.

“Start leaving your legacy every single day.”

Learn more by visiting Josh's website and follow him on LinkedIn and Instagram.

Watch this full episode on YouTube.